**originally written Tuesday, November 15, 2011**
Question to the mothers of sons: has your son ever dated a young lady that you
just wished he had made a different choice?
I get a call in August or
September 2009 advising me of a possible pregnancy, its between 2 men and my son
is one. I must say, that took a LOT of courage and nerve to put that out there
BUT I had only the UTMOST respect for her for keeping it real. I also have to be
TOTALLY honest and admit, THIS phone call immediately sent me in
to PRAYER as this was the SAME young lady who I was advised had my son
jumped in the club and who, when I asked her not to call my home ANYMORE at the
request of my son, called me out of my name. YES, she called me the "B" word
*the horror*!!! I have NO respect for anyone who has no respect
for me.
I didn't hear anymore from this young lady until she went into
labor. After the baby was born I asked for a picture and I have to say she and
Daysha looked almost IDENTICAL at birth. I showed the picture to Nana Danielle
and she asks me when did I take that picture of Daysha and was TOTALLY shocked
when I advised that was NOT Daysha. Both have the signature COOPER forehead that
Dante's father so lovingly shares with all of his children and grandchildren!
*laughs*
Things got a little crazy at this point, especially for the next
6 months, because all of a sudden this baby was the other young man's baby.
Pictures of the baby and her "daddy" posted all over Facebook with folk
commenting on how much she looked like her "daddy". I didn't QUITE know how to
feel about all this, I mean, you called me talking about it may be my grandchild
and then pretty much snatch her away. Now keep in mind no DNA testing of ANY
kind had been done to determine who the father is but this is "daddy". What I
think it really was? This is who you wanted the father to be so that's how you
played it...until the tables turned! It wasn't until the the mother of the
"daddy" got involved that the gears shifted. She wasn't accepting the baby as
her granddaughter so now you're calling and wanting to get my son's info so he
can be tested, MIND YOU, this is 6 months in to the baby's life.
**SIDE NOTE** Being a "nana" is a very special job and takes a very
special kind of person to truly execute this GOD given task!! I simply can not
imagine missing one moment of Daysha's life, the first 6 months are so
essential.
By now I am really feeling some kind of way, what exactly
IS the deal here?!?! So this is the point where you are now bringing her around
and getting acquainted with Daysha's mom Ashlee, when you can. This was a
really important and adult move on both of the mothers as they are young and
share a "baby daddy" who , for whatever reason, brings drama to situations. Why
my son??? Anyway, things seem to be going fine UNTIL you want to get jealous and
feel like I am showing favoritism!!! *drags needle across record* WTF?!?!??! Now
I am a bit more confused and pissed off as: 1) we still don't know if she is my
son's or not (although the results of the other "daddy" came back not the
father) and 2) I've been with Daysha from DAY ONE! It would be crazy to think my
bond with her would be any different than its always been. I have to get to know
the beautiful little girl you are introducing into our lives 6 months later.
You then begin writing my son filling his head with that foolishness
about favoritism like he was gon' check me, really?!?! NO ONE puts funds
on his books but ME! NO ONE goes to visit him but ME on a consistent
basis so imagine him doing that...RIGHT! So moving on...this goes on for a bit,
this favoritism conversation to the point that now Ashlee, Daysha's mom is
feeling slightly offended. The icing on the cake; I take Daysha to VA to meet
the Vann clan and all kind of negativity pops up on Facebook. Like what you ask?
Well your daughter doesn't need another side of the family, you and your family
are all she needs, stuff like that. When this is brought to my attention and I
address it you try to tell me it wasn't meant for me but for the other "daddy"
family. Did they really care, she wasn't their family?? (I guess I was born
yesterday)
It had gotten to the point that (STILL pre-DNA
results) I took Christmas gifts back!! You are so mad that you tell folk
"she ain't gotta buy my baby nothing" then 2 months later you ask are we coming
to her 1st birthday party, like really??!!? You don't bring her by, you talk
crap about me and now you want to know are we coming? You should have already
known the answer to that. So here again, the baby is snatched away (2nd time
since birth and there is 1 more MAJOR take away).
DNA results come
back...
***NANA LOVES YOU MI'JAEL C VANN***
No comments:
Post a Comment